Turns Out I Have Strong Feelings About Socks

A little bit about myself: I consider myself to be a minimalist. One of the ways that I make that happen is that I own very few clothes, well, at least I own fewer clothes than most other people.
I definitely recognize that it is a bit extreme. When my wife and I first started dating, she gave me a look of horror when I told her that I only own two pairs of pants. This experience isn’t, I have been accused of dressing like a cartoon character because I’m always wearing the same garments. Don’t worry, I do own more than two pairs of pants today.
While all this works well for me, I understand that this is not the right choice for everyone.
I do; however, have strong feelings about socks. I feel that most people have far too much variety and would be significantly happier if they adhered to some of the principles I’m laying out here.
1. All of your socks must be the same
All of your socks should match. They should match in color, style, brand, and fabric. If all the socks match, that means that they can each be paired with one another. If all socks can be paired with all other socks, you never have to worry about sorting them when putting away laundry.
When doing this, you should pick socks from a higher-end clothing brand. Not because the socks are inherently better, but because they change the socks up less so you have a greater chance of buying replacements later.
Be wary of brands that label their socks “left” and “right” (Bombas does this). I assume they do this because if you lose one, you’re more likely to buy another pair because they are not interchangeable.
2. All socks must be black
Black socks are the most versatile of the socks that you can own. Black socks don’t stain easily. Black socks can be washed with your colors. Black socks also match the greatest number of shoes and clothing options.
3. Socks should be made with low-friction fibers
The socks you own should be athletic-oriented and made of synthetic polyester or Merino wool. The benefit here is that you’ll fewer (if any) blister in the future. Properly setting up your socks as well as your shoes to match mean that you can hike long distances and never have to worry about a blister. I have recommended this choice to multiple friends, and all of them have said that it has improved or eliminated their foot issues.
4. The socks should be athletic-oriented
As a lazy person, I need to reduce as many barriers as possible to exercise. This means that I have to be able to work out in my socks. This does increase the wear the socks because they’re doing double duty; however, since all socks are interchangeable, replacement is easier.
Another advantage of athletic socks is they tend to have more padding. For me, I need all the padding I can get.
Isn’t this a bit dogmatic?
When first starting out with this, it’s a good idea to set firm boundaries. Once you start mixing in different sock brands, it’s very easy to end back up at square one.
I’m also not saying that you can NEVER have different socks, but those socks are the exceptional ones and not the ones for daily use. For example, I have two pairs of socks that I’m going to hold on to for a while: the socks I wore on my wedding day and the socks with my daughter’s face printed on them.
If you live in a climate where temperature is quite variable (Wisconsin for instance), it may be worth having a warm and cold set of socks. I’ve needed thicker socks to deal with the colder midwest weather.
How should I go about doing this?
Since getting a whole drawer of nice athletic socks can be pretty big commitment (not to mention the expense), I recommend going to the store and picking out a few different options as single pairs. Wear them for a little while before taking the plunge. Why not date the sock before you marry it?
Depending on the brand, you may get lucky and could find some bulk pricing at purchase. Unlikely for higher-end socks, but it’s worth a try.
Do you have any sock recommendations?
This is highly personal, but I’m a big fan of Balega. They last awhile (years for me) and aren’t too hard to get ahold of.
In the future, I might experiment with Darn Tough. I like the idea of having a sock with a lifetime warranty. I’m not sure if this would be abusing the policy, but if I’m reading this correctly, this may be the last set of socks I’d have to buy.
In short, this is definitely worth a try. Give yourself the gift of spending less time sorting laundry and making fewer decisions. It’s well worth the upfront effort.